8.

Illegal Thoughts [12/18/08]

The words form in my brain, little thoughts. Quiet, I tell them. I tell them, don't even start this.
I overdo it, they don't stop terrorizing me. [I secretly like to think about-]
I want to confront the subject of my dreams, I want to I want to I want to.
It's in the crevices of my bones, it weighs me down, sinks deeper into my head.
I feel the words crawl up the windpipe and I tense, what will happen? They sprawl across the back of my throat, on my tongue, they glide out with a minty aftertaste.
I love you.

Illegal Thoughts, Pt2. [08/27/09]

These illegal thoughts, I keep them out of your light. Those hungry words I said with my face in your chest, when we first met. Heads and limbs knotted together. It took months to untangle me from you, we were just like swans.
Is anyone watching? You can kiss me now. You can always miss me, just don't tell him that.
These kids aren't alright, they sneak off to see each other every Friday night.
"I'll make you a deal," I said. "a lifetime of hurt for a few nights year." And I can sit and watch you do your homework, so serious, all day. We can pretend I'm not three-hundred miles away, but alone in your room.
We're so desperate for a little time. We're an underage girl and a boy who demolished these lines.